Another long day…

It has always amazed me how rude people can be to complete strangers, let alone people they know well. I find it hard to believe that with a glance a person can immediately assume the worst in a person and treat a complete stranger like a disease.

Working at a small convenience store, I deal with many different kinds of people. Personally, I hate my job, I have always felt very awkward around others and tend to be more of an Observer. Fear of rejection has led to the attitude I have with talking to others. This then creates another problem. I cannot handle confrontation. This personality flaw has led to much suffering. Today was one of the day’s people decided to test me.

My morning started out with little sleep and a bad cough from the fourth day of my cold. I had woken 4 times throughout the night feeding and rocking my 11-month-old son back to bed. This was a bad night. A mysterious force seemed to wake him without reason every hour on the hour. By the time I got myself to sleep, it was already time to start the day.

I had the afternoon shift and the moment I arrived, I knew how my day would pan out. We received new pop coolers the day before. My coworker before me neglected to properly stock anything. All she did was move the old stock to the new machines a twenty minute or less job. She quickly grabbed her things and left. At my work, only one-person works a shift there are no scheduled breaks if you have to pee and the door rings you either piss off a customer or hold it until you burst. This also meant any work left by the morning girl was left to you. Which I think is bullshit. Get your work done then you may leave. However, I am not the boss. Therefore, I was left to remove every item in the coolers and stock everything, which would have taken far less time if I did not need to remove items and put them back.

My mood was already foul when a customer gave me grief. He bought $6.25 worth of items and handed me $10.00 asking for a five back. He then gave me another dollar. When I explained that I needed another dollar he started yelling how I was trying to rip him off and by telling him sir change for then ten is 3.75 if you want the five I will need two dollars because only one will be a quarter short leaving the total to 4.75. I was stared at as if I was the idiot. I even had to bring up a calculator and he still tried to argue with me about it. He held up my line slammed his fists raising his voice at me. I knew my voice was getting a pissy tone but you can only explain something so many times before you start to snap. I showed him one last time and he proceeded to throw another dollar down and say well I guess I am just old and stupid. Making me seem like the a-hole. This was my strike one with people.

Only twenty minutes later I had a man come I to the store and demand I tell him why the gas pumps charged him $56.00 on a $21.00 dollar gas bill. When I said I have no idea all I can think is… he snapped and said well you should you work here do not you. It is very hard to explain anything to anyone when you cannot even finish a sentence. I tried to explain four times when I finally got angry and said you calm down while waving my arms. I explained, the card is tested to see if it has a certain amount of money to charge to and the money is never taken, it is only put on hold for a short time. He said well it is electronic it should be automatic it is electronic. Then the magic sentence came. “Let me speak to your manager!”. I called her explaining the customer had a complaint about our pumps. The conversation lasted less than a minute as she explained the same way I had while he insisted electronic things do not work that way and maybe it needed to be updated. Sorry buddy this is a small town you can only expect so much.

We only take money for our pumps anyways we do not own them the local co-op does we have no say in the way they work. I had told him this after he hung up on my manager and slammed down the phone on my counter further pressing my patients with the man. Of course, this did not matter. He stormed out the doors. Cursing profanity as he left about how stupid this and that was. Honestly, this was turning into a bad start to my day.

The rude man came back after speaking to his wife and actually had the gall to ask me sell him his chew, which we specially ordered for him I might add. I found this funny to say the least. After cursing my name and the stores, he actually wanted me the “incompetent” sales woman to service him. I am sure my face told more than I wanted to show. My mind was racing thoughts of who the fuck does this asshole think he is after causing such a scene thinking I have to serve his sorry ass. Of course, I sold him his chew being the non-petty person I am. However, what really set off my mood were his snarky comments afterwords. “At least you can do one thing right tsk”. Hold on guy, did you really just insult me again. Like this shit was my fault as if I’m the one who set all this shit up to ruin your fucking day. Well excuse me sir sorry you are so easily inconvenienced you do not have to shop here you could go flaunt your pissy ass attitude somewhere else I know I sure as hell wouldn’t mind missing your business. Have a good day is all I said to him as I walked away from him.

I ended up in the bathroom choking back tears. Being screamed at all morning and having no choice but to take it or lose my job is exhausting. I slapped my cheeks and told myself to buck up you should be used to this. You cannot change how others act you have to brush it off karma will catch them some time. A few minutes and I calmed myself. I sent my boyfriend a text that if another person screamed at me today I would quit. His reply was you cannot I do not have a job. He recently quit four jobs because they “weren’t right for him” making it hard to get by with our son. I knew I could not quit but I wanted a comforting word.

Strike three. How dare he tell me I cannot quit after I begged him to stay at his jobs until he found another one because we had a newborn and needed to have steady income. How dare he say my feelings were somehow less than his were. I have been working this job that I hate for 2 years now because it was flexible and close to home giving up my wants to make it easy for us. Moreover, he has the balls to say I do not have a job yet so income is on you. Like no shit, I know that but you obviously did not give a damn how I felt when I told you to think about your actions. He has been jobless since early November not for lack of looking. However, he had jobs he blew off because they did not suit him. Fuck that being an adult is giving up your wants to support the family. Before making a decision. You think about the consequences of that action. He did not give a damn how much pressure I would be under now that he does not work. Everything is on me it is extremely stressful. All I wanted was him to say I understand we can look for something new together or it will be OK we will figure something out. Like I had to when he was the idiot, but I get no you cannot. Pssh. My phone was turned off and I got back to work.

My day went quickly after that thankfully the weather was chilly and it forced most to stay indoors. I do not think I could handle another confrontation without a full out bawl. My mood was still gloomy left with thoughts that my life was only partly how I hoped it would be. The normal crappy day thoughts. I was distant to my boyfriend and he definitely noticed. I wanted time to cool but he is not that type of person he likes to settle things upfront. He blamed my mood on the man I dealt with saying I was pissy from that and I told him to hush I was fine. Obviously not. However, I hate fighting and this one would end big. I just needed time to cool. He knew I was upset and tried to comfort me a handhold gentle touches. His efforts got him a quick smirk and a pat on the hand. I know he cares it is just a rough patch in life, and it leads to strain on the relationship. Every relationship has problems that can be dealt with. Just because he made stupid choices did not mean I loved him less. We are in it for the long haul and I am sure more days such as this will follow. I know in my heart that all the good times will far outweigh the bad and lead to many life lessons and stories to be passed down our family. This was just another one of those bad days.